I was inspired to start fostering because I work in the social work industry; my first role was  supporting foster carers and foster children. It was a pretty big reality, seeing the need and the number of children who are in out-of-home care. I thought, “One day I’ll be a foster carer.” I could see the demand and wanted to provide young people with some safe homes and positive opportunities. Here I was, encouraging everyone around me to learn more about foster care and becoming a foster carer, so I thought, “I better lead by example and do it myself!”

My amazing mum also inspired me. So much of who I am comes from my mum. She taught me how to look after myself and how to care for others – especially children. She was always one to give back. I recognised how lucky I was, and I thought becoming a foster carer would be a way to pay that forward.

I live quite a busy life, working full-time, and I'm a wedding celebrant as well. So when I started foster caring last year, I thought, “I’m probably not in the right stage of my life to be caring for little kids, but I would love to support some teenagers, teach them some life skills and do my best to create some positive opportunities and outcomes for them.” Moreso the older teenagers, who are a bit misunderstood by society on what’s going on for them. And I know that we have a lack of carers wanting to support teenagers. 

Sometimes I'll be a short-term carer or provide an emergency placement. One of the teenage boys that I've supported came for 10 weeks and then a carer was identified that could care for him on an ongoing basis. I've got a young person staying with me at the moment – we don't really have a time frame on it, because we're just trying to get him settled and learn more about his needs. It's his first time in care, so things are all very new for him. We're just settling in and will see how we go.

The most rewarding parts of being a foster carer are the little wins. It's the casual moments – being able to sit back on the couch with them and you can see they're safe, you can see they're calm. The trust that kind of slowly builds – when you get to a point where you can see a young person truly comfortable in your home – is so nice. And if they go from not attending school to going one day a week, to going three or four days a week. Catching yourself in those little positive moments is really nice.

It's not all sunshine and rainbows – young people in care have experienced difficulties in their past. But kids bring so much fun and laughter. When fostering teenage boys, there are so many funny questions and conversations! 

Sometimes people can think, “Oh, I don't want that responsibility,” when they think about fostering. But there is so much support available. You've got a care team of professionals who are supporting the young person, and are also giving you advice and supporting you along the way. There is also always a dedicated support person from Mackillop Family Services allocated to each young person. They are there to debrief, problem-solve issues and share the load so it doesn’t feel like it’s all your responsibility. 

Working full-time and running my own business can be really hectic, and adding foster caring on top of that can seem like a challenge. But fostering has taught me that I can do hard things and my resilience is a lot higher than I thought it was. Initially I thought, “I’ll just start and see how I go.” Now I can’t really imagine my life without fostering. There is something so special about being able to show up for someone else – especially a child that hasn’t had the opportunities that you've had, but still deserves them; they just haven’t been lucky enough to be in those situations. 

Anyone can be a foster carer, you just have to be open-minded enough to be led by the professionals and led by the children; to be motivated to support the kids at their own pace and see what their needs are; to give them that love and kindness. 

Being a foster carer can look any way you want. It just starts with a phone call to a foster care agency where you can learn more about it and understand what it could look like for you. Be really honest about what you can provide and see how you go.

There were some reservations from my friends and family when I started fostering – mainly due to myths and stereotypes around kids and especially teenage boys. But once they met the young people that were in my care and learnt more about it, they said, “Oh, this is so not what I thought!”

I'm not going to lie – you do love the children and make attachments. It can be emotionally challenging when they're in and out of your house, at times, but the benefits and the positives far outweigh those challenges.

This article was brought to you in partnership with MacKillop Family Services. Keen to learn more about foster care and how you can make a huge difference to a young life? Give them a call, fill in the online enquiry form or or listen to the Preparing our Hearts: A Foster Care Journey podcast on your favourite podcast listening app.