tunesday – ber’s break-up playlist

Everyone knows it: break-ups suck. But while most of us spend the months (or even years) after a relationship ends wallowing in self-pity, there are some supremely talented people out there who use that dreaded time to create art.

Minnesotan singer-songwriter Ber is one such person. She has just released her new EP Halfway and it's inspired by that weird, uncomfy place that find yourself in when you're about halfway through the journey of getting over heartbreak. We recently caught up with Ber to chat about the record, and asked her to share her own break-up playlist.

Hi Ber! What is your new EP about? It’s about the recognition of the void that exists halfway between heartbreak and happy – specifically how it feels to WANT to move on, but to struggle completely within it. These songs were written by a version of me who was stuck there, self-sabotaging a tonne and in denial about so much, but also painfully aware that I was keeping myself in that void on purpose.

Each track is inspired by stories that made me laugh at myself. This is reflected quite heavily in the big indie tunes on this EP, “Slutphase”, “Your Internet Sucks” and “Boys Who Kiss You in Their Car”, specifically. Writing these was a fun opportunity for self-reflection and acceptance. Now, they are empowering anthems for me. At high contrast, “Superspreader”, “Halfway” and “Over You” really reflect on my innermost reasons for needing to feel like everything was on fire. 

How did the EP come to be? I wrote most of it in my friend Brad's basement in Minnesota, which feels exceptionally fitting. I'm very lucky to have collaborated with some of my favourite artists and best friends on these songs that are so close to my heart. We truly laughed and cried our way through every song. The EP is very much filled with a dichotomy of emotions because my brain was splitting itself in half while I wrote it. Heartbreak is messy! And these songs were an outlet for me at my messiest. I’m very happy for it to be out in the world.

Did any of the tracks on your break-up playlist have an influence on Halfway? No, not directly. But these songs all cover a different stage of grief, which I think the EP does, too. And when it comes to the break-up that I wrote this EP about, lots of these songs are songs that I found comfort in, and that aided my own healing process. 

How do you look after yourself following a break-up? I think every break-up I’ve experienced has elicited a different version of me. My most recent one was two years ago. I truly became a hermit, stayed in my basement and cried for months. I think I needed to get it out of my system. I journaled and wrote a lot, which has always been an outlet, and it’s affirming for me to be explaining my emotions to myself in that way; working through them with words. 

BER'S BREAK-UP PLAYLIST

1. Femininomenon – Chappell Roan This is the first thing I’m reaching for post break-up. Earlier in life I would have immediately sunk into a sad, “drivers license”-type beat. But not anymore. This song feels equally like the end of a movie and the start of a new era. It’s empowering and messy and makes me feel unstoppable. It’s a solid reminder that you deserve the world!

2. What A Time – Julia Michaels and Niall Horan OK, I’m gonna send myself immediately into my feels. Break-ups are rollercoasters. This song… I remember where I was when I first heard it. It just hits me and makes me long for the simplest things. I feel a little nauseous and my hands are shaking, I guess that means you’re close by. I mean COME ON. Let me just reminisce about every good and bad thing that happened during our relationship and lay it to rest. 

3. Favorite Crime – Olivia Rodrigo This song is stunning. It brings me to a place where I allow myself to grieve and really feel the pain that I want to feel when my heart hurts. It’s poetic but also raw and real. My go-to ‘sad cry in the car’ song. 

4. Kissing Other People – Lennon Stella I feel like this serves as a good anthem for anyone who’s hopeful for the future and starts to believe in love again. Or, anyone who’s really in denial and anxiously awaiting the feelings depicted in these lyrics. Haha.

5. you were good to me – Jeremy Zucker and Chelsea Cutler This song rips me to shreds. The dual perspective is sad and tragic and feels like you’re replaying all of the happy moments. It leaves you with a sweet taste in your mouth. When I was really going through it, this song reminded me that we all grow. Whether it be together or apart, we all grow. And I think that’s a healthy reminder. 

6. Over You – Ber I feel weird putting my own song in this list, but this song has brought me a certain peace that I hope it might bring for you, too. We get to a point in our heartbreak where we’ve just had enough of the sad. We’ve processed. We’ve felt every single feeling possible. It’s exhausting. And this song is about that.